Piece by Piece

perfection

I was at Ikea earlier today looking to shop for furniture for my room. I have lived in my room for about 1 year now and I have yet to really decorate it the way I want. I always seem to have a reason not to fully decorate.  One reason is because I keep telling myself I would move soon. “I won’t be at the house much longer,” a tiny voice tells me every time I think of decorating and making the space mine.

The problem with this little voice is that it tells me things like this all the time. I never quite take the time I need to create a space I love because something always seems off. The situation needs seems perfect. I always yearn for more. The thing that I am learning is that I can’t pause my pursuit of happiness because my situation is not perfect.

I have been stuck in a rut. So many ideas and no way to see them to fruition because I was too stuck in the rut of waiting to be perfect. If I am not perfect at stage 1, then I can’t get to a point where I feel like my ideas are valid.Lately, I have been missing writing my blog. So many ideas and things to say but no way get my thoughts out. Too stuck in the idea that in order to express myself, I have to have the perfect words and language

Finally, I have finally reached a point where I realize that perfection is my greatest enemy. Perfection is the roadblock that stops me from living a full life. Nobody that appears to have a full life woke up and had everything in place. No perfectly designed room magically appeared with all it pieces in place.

Slowly, I have come to a place of acceptance that my situation is not perfect. I have also come to the realization that I can build my life piece by piece. And I have been doing that. I am have gone on adventures to places close by. One day, my adventures would take me further and to grander places. I have started putting my room together, piece by piece. Last week, I bought myself a bookcase from Walmart. It was not perfect but it brought part of my vision to life. Today at Ikea, I bought a table. It is not perfect but another part of my vision is coming to be.

As I go through it piece of the transformation progress, I have come to a place of realizing that perfect lives are built. Mine isn’t perfect at the moment but I can get closer, piece by piece.

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